Showing posts with label Moments. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Moments. Show all posts

Nov 25, 2018

A teardrop



Was that a drop of tear I saw glistening near his eyes?

I will never know because he turned his face away, as soon as he heard the song begin
 and Lata’s unmistaken honeyed voice wifted across softly....

When he looked back at all of us across the table : 
there was such a delight which lit up his face -
Something which came from deep within Him!

We were sitting together in a restaurant talking about Hindi songs - old and very old ...

He wanted to listen to a number he hadn’t heard in sixty long years 

I just googled the words and played the song to him : in NANOSECONDS 
Dil Jalega

An ordinary moment became extraordinary for me , as I glimpsed into my Dad's soul...
Moment of unexplainable connection 

Oct 4, 2018

Looking without judgment


"The difference between a flower and a weed is - Judgement !" Wayne Dyer

"Such beautiful flowers....Where did you pick them up from?"

I had come to a weekend getaway with friends and what greeted us at the reception, on the side table were these bunch of pink and white beauties!

"They are all over the estate, " said the lady who had ushered us in our quaint cottage, " Didn't you see?"

"No, I guess we missed them !"

Indeed when I noticed carefully in the estate 
these pink beauties bobbed up and down in the wind in the grass, 
looking as if someone had laid out a verdant green carpet with pink flowers 

So intent was I on looking at the "BEAUTY", that I failed to notice it!

How typical...
I laughed to myself....
Missing the obvious, because I was searching for the profound...

as if one is superior over the other :) 

Sep 4, 2018

I live my daydreams in music....





"If I were not a physicist, I would probably be a musician. 

I often think in music. I live my daydreams in music. 


I see my life in terms of music.”

~Albert Einstein~

Ever since I can remember,
music has been an integral part of my life...

The whisper of crickets in the leechi trees in Dehradun

The loud drone of fighter planes in Basra

The koooo-koooo chook-chook of train from Mumbai to Benares in the summer holidays

The incomprehensible yet loving loris of Daddaji in chaste punjabi

The gurgling sound of Ganga at Laxman Jhoola and the swish of the paddle boats

And Lata Mangeshkar- Kishore Kumar duets on Radio Ceylon

I was a dreamy child and sought music wherever I was!

Sawant dadaji in Theosophical society, Benares, astutely channelised my love for singing
and introduced me to Gayatri Mantra and Hanuman chalisa at a very early age
Getting up at 4.30 am to hear the vedic chants reverberating in each and every cell of my body,
was the highlight of my summer holidays.
I can almost hear them even today

Bandra East, Mumbai was where I was introduced to the wonder of playlists
Those TDK cassettes zealously purchased from the duty-free shops,
Our old antique-looking German tape-recorder
And my brother and I painstakingly writing the name of the each song neatly
with our black Schaefer ink pen...

Chitrahaar, Movies and Antakshari made me the original acapella  specialist, even before the background sounds were in vogue!

Though I did not know it then,
learning Hindustani Classical at that age, was a gift given by my parents to me at that tender age!
I ofcourse, resisted the alaaps and the bhaavgeets that time, as I could hear my friends enjoying their evening play when I was practicing the aaroh- avroh ...
and struggling with passing Music exams
while my spirit was dying to participate in the unstructured play in the colony playground!

My love for gaana continued in my dating days with Uday
where his Meri bheegi bheegi  matched my Beeti na beetaayi raina 
and our romance blossomed over our eclectic choice of music:
his old Kishore Kumar numbers to my Disco Station...how we laughed at the differences...and yet the deeper almost divine bonding

and Soumya was born in a very musically alive home!

Cooing rehashed and remixed versions of nursery rhymes to put her to sleep
Converting the cups of water to jaltarang
It was hardly a surprise that my toddler was soon swaying to songs,
making playlists and swooning over Jonas brothers and Miley Cyrus!

The first playlist she made for me was the sweetest gift anyone had ever, ( and since ) given me,
each number meticulously woven in the necklace of a pretty playlist which Mom could wear and listen to anywhere, anytime....specially when she missed her moppet!

Her tradition of this gifting of love and connection still continues for me in my life ....

I make playlists whenever I want to gift a part of me to someone
and my love affair with Music continues unabashedly, unabated !

Every song with a rhythm , a heartbeat and woven with the richness of life or the ordinariness of it :)

Happy
Sad
Slow
Classical
Old
New
Rock
Jazzy
Dhinchak
English
Hindi
Regional
Global
through the ups and downs of life
bringing me closer to emotions and feelings : the aliveness of life...the joie de vivre of existence

When I look back at almost five decades of my musical moments, 
they encompass it all - 

the voice, the breath, the melody 

and the silence between the notes

the said 

and the unsaid 

I am blessed to have lived and hope to continue living in this cauldron of notes...till eternity !

Check my playlists in this youtube channel

My Playlists

Apr 22, 2018

Akele hain to kya gum hai


The Guest House


This being human is a guest house.
Every morning a new arrival.

A joy, a depression, a meanness,
some momentary awareness comes
as an unexpected visitor.

Welcome and entertain them all!
Even if they are a crowd of sorrows,
who violently sweep your house
empty of its furniture,
still, treat each guest honorably.
He may be clearing you out
for some new delight.

The dark thought, the shame, the malice.
meet them at the door laughing and invite them in.

Be grateful for whatever comes.
because each has been sent
as a guide from beyond.

— Jellaludin Rumi,
translation by Coleman Barks


Loneliness and I had kept a distance from each other....
Till she decided to visit me four years back!

I have been your quintessential extrovert, till then :

Surrounding myself with
hazaar action
peppy social do's
constant social media noise
mindless shopping
general chatter and cacophony of life....all in good doses!

When Loneliness decided to make friends with me,
it threw me off guard .....to say the least.

I was stand-offish and judgemental, in the beginning :

" I AM NOT 'THAT' SORT OF PERSON!"

The more I resisted the cloud,
more it cloaked me in feelings of isolation, despondency and unworthiness....

Finally I relented and stopped fighting her

"Come, have some chai with me !"

Some early mornings and late evenings,
I  began inviting my Loneliness to sit across on the chatai...
minus the distraction of my smartphone or netflix...
nudging her to open up her heart to me.

Initially she was reticent and she camouflaged herself in the cloak of sadness....
but slowly she relented and began opening up - and HOW !

Her devotedness to make me learn and grow as a human being, surprised me.

I discovered parts of me which I had not seen before-

Beneath the veneer of fear of being alone
was a very strong courageous human
who was committed to give herself and contributing to the life fully....

The seemingly flippant and frivolous chatter-box
hid a heart longing to connect deeper with people and with life...

the restless actions had hidden that part of me, which actually revelled in stillness.

Loneliness may have been an uninvited guest , but she has become a wonderful dost  and guide !




Rambunctious & reflective inconsistencies

"If one wants really to live life in all its richness, one has to learn how to be inconsistent, how to be consistently inconsistent, how to be able to move from one extreme to another — sometimes rooted deep in the earth and sometimes flying high in heaven, sometimes making love and sometimes meditating.

And then, slowly slowly, your heaven and your earth will come closer and closer, 
and you will become the horizon where they meet." Osho

down in the dumps of loneliness or
high on the ebullience of connections

focussed on the goals for the quarter or
scattered and chaotically ambling along

quietly reflective in solitude or
rambunctiously dancing on Bollywood numbers....

time to make peace with inconsistencies as a norm,
rather than an exception.....
in life

Afterall, there is no consistent destination to go towards, but this moment!



A teardrop

Was that a drop of tear I saw glistening near his eyes? I will never know because he turned his face away, as soon as he heard th...